I was supposed to weigh in on Tuesday, beginning of the month - and I have a confession to make, I've actually been weighing in every morning. And because I've been watching way too many fitness/loss weight TV shows (love Last 10 Pound Bootcamp and X-Weighted, not to mention Biggest Loser), I was smart (ha) enough to take my measurements at the beginning of this madness known as the Year of CHANGE (read: get healthy). But I couldn't bring myself to check the numbers until today...
Seriously?
I haven't lost any poundage - and thanks to all those who told me the last time I lamented about this that I was probably putting on muscle, I choose to believe that. Nada - the same every day for the last 2 months. But the tape! The tape would reveal the amazing work I've been doing to resculpt my body. Or. Not!
No change in the waist or hips (or that nasty area in between where I seem to have the biggest issue - is that dubbed the Love Handle - stupid name). But, lucky me, I've lost 2 inches in my bust. And as I write down those numbers, with the hope that I will not die before I get a chance to burn them, I stop in mid-write with the realization that my boobs are now the same size as my waist!
As I type this, I've moved from "Seriously!" to "WTF?"
I don't think this is what they mean by pear shape. Have you ever seen a pear that is shaped like this:
Yes, I look like the neck of a wine bottle - hmm, perhaps the wine I drink might have something to do with the shape...but, let's not go there right now...I'm ranting! (Please don't comment on the fact that my 'hips' seem to be asymmetrical - I'm a writer, not an artist, damn-it).So, all the excitement about losing inches got trashed with the realization that I am on my way to being a stick. And for those of you wondering what's so wrong about that - let me just compare the shapes women come in.
Apple
Pear - both lovely fruits. Both objects that artists paint and people
describe as succulent, juicy, tasty.
Hour Glass - I've always loved hourglasses, how they illustrate time in
such an eloquent way - and let's not forget my favorite soap in my twenties,
"Like sand through the hourglass, so our the Days of Our Lives" - that is until
Marlena was possessed by the devil (what were they thinking).
And then there are the Sticks - those who have no shape - those objects people pick up only to hurl for the joy of watching their dogs run and retrieve. Sticks!!
I must tell you a story of when I was about 16 years old. We (family) were in Scotland (both parents came from there - had to make the trip 'home' every couple of years) and I was being fitted for a custom kilt (Highland Dancer). The gentleman at Gordon's Kiltmakers came into the dressing room and measured me up. Remember, I was getting the whole kit, including a velvet vest to match. And I was 16 - not necessarily a confident 16. So, the measurements read: Bust - this number (because I don't remember the exact number), Waist - same number, Hips - same number. My mom and my aunts started to giggle. Loudly! 16 and my body sported the same numbers from top to toe!! And, obviously, I'm still carrying that humiliation around with me (just not packed in my bra).
And in this quest to get healthy (not skinny - I'm not looking to get skinny), I would much prefer if the title to this blog and my subsequent goal was "Anchors Away". The butt, or the part after the wine bottle neck (see above lame drawing) is seriously weighing me down.
Hey, at least that number isn't the same as the bust and waist now - at the ripe old age of almost 48!!
Have a great weekend, People of Blogland :)
:hugs: Do you feel healthier? Like can you walk/run/bike farther than you used to? Does your body feel better than it used to before you started your journey? If so, it's working - regardless of what the numbers say. You're improving your life and increasing your longevity, and that's why we're doing this. Right? Get that first and worry about the shape later.
ReplyDelete(Although, getting back into my jeans sure would be nice. :snerk:)
Hang in there, sweetie. I'm sure you're doing fine.
This is exactly why I shun the weight scale, and hide all tape measures. I watch what I eat, get a modicum of daily exercise, and the clothes from five years ago still fit. And yes, I still wear clothes from five years ago. Heck, I still wear clothes from ten years ago. Did I mention I hate shopping, and am half Scottish? LOL
ReplyDeleteHang in there. As long as you FEEL healthy, you're on the right track.
I am doing fine, B.E. - thanks for the hugs. I just needed to rant about my decreasing bust size. It's amazing how I always lose inches there first - exactly where I don't need to lose inches. Some cruel joke played by the Weight-loss Gods!!
ReplyDeleteAnd, BTW, I am feeling healthier. And fitter - and the evidence comes in the form of being able to run further or spring faster. Yeah, Me!!
FYI - I have a pair of jeans I'm dying to get back into (from about 7 years ago).
My kind of girl, Lu - I have clothes from ten years ago, too. Actually wore a shirt the other day that I got in the 90's, still love it! And, horror of horrors, I still have favorite clothes from the 80's that I just can't part with. I'm hoping big shoulder pads come back - but not the big hair, don't want to go that far into the 80's (ha).
ReplyDeleteAnd good for you for finding a balance that works! I swear if I had just kept moving instead of sitting down to write every waking moment, I wouldn't be in the shape I am right now. The things I could tell my younger self (ooh, blogpost idea :)
Hi Janet,
ReplyDeleteI feel your pain. I lose weight there first as well (so annoying).
Just focus on your overall health as much as you can. I know it's hard when the scale and the measuring tape show you things you don't want see. Not to mention the mirror!
Oiy - the mirror!! Don't get me started on that, Joanne ;)
ReplyDeleteThe other thing I'm trying to remember is that the weight (my writer's ass, as I like to call it, didn't appear in 3 months. It took 6 years of sitting to get me in this shape, I have to remember that it will take time to come off! And a slow weight loss is a better weight loss.
I should have that stuck to my scale...better yet, I should get rid of the scale and tape, ala Lu's outlook on life :)
Janet,
ReplyDeleteThis my Year of the Bod too - exercise, food et al. I have learned a number of things, although my dedication to routine is sparse.
1. If you stand with your arms stretched up as high as you can, the body you had when you were 16 reappears.
2. numbers are reversible. At 16,I was 36-24-36. Now I am 42-36-42.
3. If you look straight down, your body looks as it did when you were 16, provided you have used the scales to break every mirror in the house and seriously believe in fairy tales. Look up. Maybe prayer helps.
4. Love handles (what a gross word) travel south and make the pockets in your jeans look as though they are stuffed with either money or kleenex.
5. stuffing cotton balls in your bra is good.
6. don't worry. there isn't one of who dares to compare.
Husbands seldom really look at you after the wedding anyway.
connie
Have to tell you a boob joke.
ReplyDeleteGod created Eve and put her in the garden.
He went to visit his lovliest of creations and asked her how she was doing.
She said she was fine but she had two of everything - arms, legs etc - but she had three boobs. God immediately removed the boob and threw it away.
The next time God visited Eve, he asked if there was anything she wanted. Well, she was lonely.
God said he would make a man to keep her company, but he would have to use a part of her to do this.
"Where's that useless boob I threw away"?
Hi Janet,
ReplyDeleteNo sweating the small stuff, (no pun intended) boobs just get in the way, they're way over rated. Just be happy that you're becoming a healthier you.
Did that work? Hope your day has gotten better. :hugs:
And if none of those comments helped, I'll add my own. I'm pretty much a stick myself. The ONLY thing keeping my measurements from all being the same is the indent of my waist. I never had big boobs but what I did have I lost having my two girls. I now look like a 13 year old who is just STARTING to bloom :/ Ah well, feel better my friend - I'd rather be a healthy stick than an unfit hourglass!
ReplyDeleteACK - read these in my inbox and then promptly forgot to come over here to answer. Sorry, girls :(
ReplyDeleteConnie - You crack me up! I'll have to add those to my "When Calories Don't Count" list. And I love the boob joke :)
Erika - Yes - your wisdom helped. I keep forgetting that small boobs have some advantages, not the least is being able to go braless without everyone knowing it. OK, now everyone knows it *sigh*.
ban - A fellow stick :) And you are so right about being healthy - THE most important thing I'm trying to do in this year of CHANGE. Thanks, ban!