Running Reno...

I'm still hacking and sniffling - and not running! This results in a very poor looking training schedule and some serious self-talk about what I'm going to do in just over 8 weeks. That's all the time left before the Bluenose Marathon! My longest run has been 12 miles (I've done two of them) - the marathon is 26.2 miles! Yes, I'm playing the Blame Game - the illness, the weather (note to self: never train for a marathon over the winter when you know you're never going to run in cold, snow or ice). But the reality is that I (me, myself - no one to blame) fell off the training wagon!

I will get back on that wagon, though! The marathon was a big event, but it wasn't the focus of my year - that focus is to run 50K in September to celebrate turning 50. And dammit, that's going to happen. After a book suggestion by JB Lynn (thanks, JB), I ordered The Non-Runner's Marathon Guide for Women by Dawn Dais - I was looking for some inspiration. I found it in spades. The book is hilarious - and written by a non-runner (a woman who hates running - and even after her marathon, continues to hate running - my kind of runner). After devouring the book like a woman who hasn't had fast food for 3 months and is presented with a buffet of burgers, fries, onion rings and fried chicken, I have renewed my vow to run that 50K!

And the race in a little over 8 weeks? I'll take that down to a half (13.1 miles) and collect my bling, t-shirt and enjoy the free food afterward. I will also take away the lesson learned - I do not like running races! I believe it's community fun runs from now on. Because looking back at my training journal, I was actually enjoying (I know!) my earlier training runs when there was no pressure about the upcoming race. No pressure to figure out what kind of nutrition to take with me on the long runs. And no pressure with the amount of time it was taking me to run those distances.

Am I disappointed, you may ask? I was - but somethings in life are just too trivial to risk falling off the fast food wagon. I think I was more worried about what others would say (my usual worry) - but they're not the ones running (or not running in my case over the past couple of weeks). And they're not the ones staring at me when I look in the Turkey Neck App-ed Mirror every morning. They say that running teaches you lessons - I certainly am learning lots (bonus - even without the running) - lessons in admitting my limitations and lessons in asking myself if this (insert anything for this) is what I really, really want (or is it one of those 'kinda wants' - or worse, one of those 'someone else wants'). I'm also learning to be more gentle with myself.

So the running renovation is done. I have a lovely new training schedule and a bevy of non-winter months to look forward to!

Rose-Colored Glasses...

I'm waiting on some news - and the time is ticking down, the news should be coming in at any time. I'm on pins and needles and refreshing my e-mail like nobody's business. My stomach is in knots and my edginess is, well, over the edge! I was asked this weekend what I will do if the news isn't the news I want to hear. And that got me thinking about expectations.

I have always been a rose-colored glasses kind of gal. I expect great things - even if I haven't done anything to change the dynamics in order for great things to occur. I just expect great things (have I not made that connection, yet, after almost 50 years - outcome is dependent on change and if there's no change, how can the outcome be any different?).

Aside from my input/output epiphany I've just had (and will possibly use for another blogpost), my expectations have always been high and my over-active imagination creates the future in techni-color. For example: in high school, I was interviewed for a student exchange (one of three) and between the interview and the announcement had imagined the entire next year living in Australia - the people I'd meet, the places I'd see, the wonderful kangaroos!! I didn't get the 'job'! And disappointment set in. I had the same experience with my first teaching interview - a small community on Canada's West Coast (north) where I had my entire first year mapped out with such details as what I'd wear walking along the rocky coast on a cool fall day! Seriously, I should have written it down, would have made a fabulous scene in a book. I didn't get the job - I was disappointed.

See the pattern? Now my first teaching job up on Canada's North Coast (the Arctic) didn't have that same problem. I was interviewed out of the blue (hadn't applied there), couldn't fathom what the Arctic looked like (other than snow and ice) and was offered the job in 24 hours, with the push to have me packed, on a plane and arriving there within a two week period. No time to imagine anything!

Besides that example, the high expectation followed by disappointment has plagued me my entire life. This news I'm waiting on - yep, expectation is high, imagination has been active - what will I do if it's not the news I've dreamed of?

OK - 10 minutes passed there and I sat in complete silence with fingers stilled over the keyboard because I don't know! I.Don't.Know.

Perhaps I should just BE! Perhaps I should remember that, at this moment, the world will not end. And, perhaps, next time I have these big expectations and my mind starts conjuring up all kinds of scenarios, I should get out my pen and paper and write them down - my rose-colored glasses could be my magical portal into a story world that's begging to be told!

Do you wear rose-colored glasses? Are your expectations so high that when they don't materialize you're left bereft and lost at sea for a time? Excuse me, I have to go refresh my e-mail!!!

Moving Forward...

Ooh, I hate sitting at the keyboard on days when I don't have a blog topic! I search every corner of my brain for a spark of an idea, go over my standard list (running, reading, writing) and usually discard those that are brave enough to put their hand up. I tell them it's because I just wrote about something similar, or that it would take too long to do some research to go with that idea, or THAT is just too personal (surprisingly, considering some of the personal stuff I have put up here). I placate them with the promise that I will write about it another time and then continue to search - grasping at anything that may get me a couple hundred words and can be called a blogpost!

Or, I do what I'm doing right now and just type. Already I'm a paragraph in and that blank page is starting to look better. THIS is a strategy I've shared with many people when we talk 'writing' - just start typing, the words will come! I've used that strategy myself - only not as often as I should - and I know it works. There are various manuscripts hanging around that have paragraphs of me talking to myself - similar to this blogpost! Something magical happens when I allow myself room to just type (talk). My brain relaxes and opens up, Muse is roused from her slumber and more words rush to be included!

It's like I get out of my own way.

I need to take my own advice - I've started a new project and then stopped. It didn't feel right, so I pulled my hands from the keyboard and tried to 'think' about it. Thinking does not get the words written. Sure, I toss around some ideas. I visualize a plot point or two. I can even think of some new characters - but that doesn't translate to words written. I get in my way. This is why nothing got written after Lady Bells! I shouldn't let that happen again - I know how to move forward - I need to take my own advice!!

And, see! A blogpost! Simply from putting those fingers on the keyboard and typing - opening up my brain to words - not worrying about whether they're the right words or the best words, just acknowledging the words and moving forward. Moving forward and getting out of my own way - advice I need to take to other aspects of my life!!!

How do you move forward in your writing?

End of the World Party Leads to...

...The World Continues Headache!!

Notes to self:

Don't host a party on a Wednesday Night!

Don't drink red wine out of a tumbler!

Don't eat the rest of the chips and dip after everyone leaves!

Do check the coffee pot before going to bed to make sure there is water in the machine - setting it to come on and getting up to a hot pot, no coffee, is not good!

Don't believe the next "World is Ending" hoax and quit your job...

No, I didn't do that, don't worry! So, that means, I am faced with The Day Job AND a headache this morning. And no coffee - did I mention no coffee? It's going to be a long day (but so worth it since the party was fabulous).

Here's to the world spinning on!!!!

The End...

...well, tomorrow - according to some. The Mayan Calendar End of the World Scare - are you ready? From all that I've Googled, there are many possible end dates including tomorrow (12/12/12 - at noon), Dec. 21st at 11:11 (go HERE to read about the actual Mayan Calendar and how it works - fascinating) or Dec. 23rd. There is so much information on the 'event', my 'take' - the Mayan Calendar Guy simply got tired of making calendar pages so many years in advance that he gave up! I certainly would have lost interest in creating a calendar for thousands of years in the future!

No, this THE END is about Dancing with the Bodyguard, my NaNoWriMo project. I 'finished' NaNo on Nov. 30 with a little over 51,000 words. Yesterday, I finished the story at almost 60,000 words! After years of starting and stopping, of questioning whether or not I could finish another story, of doubting my own love of storytelling, I finally finished! The feeling that came over me yesterday was relief - but excitement and accomplishment were close on relief's heels. When you have doubted for so long and you finally break free of that doubt, anything's possible.

As I said during NaNo, my creative self is flying. And that was no more evident than yesterday. No sooner had I typed THE END, than Muse was whispering in my ear. Another story needs to be told. I plan to open a word document (well, a Scrivener document because after many recommendations - Janice, Karyn, Silver - I've decided to purchase the publishing software) and keep writing! I will be taking my Advice for Beginning Runners and applying it to my writing:

1. Start
2. Be Realistic (especially at this time of the year)
3. Do Not Compare Yourself to Others
4. Keep a Journal (although, with Scrivener, I may not have to)
5. Use a Schedule
6. Writing Blogs - Beware
7. Don't Be Afraid
8. Sustained Effort (B.E.'s addition)

Any NaNoWriMos out there still working on their story? Anyone finished? Do you think that creativity breeds more creativity? Anyone partying tomorrow so they can meet the End of the World with a Big Bang?

Friday Ramblings Lead to Writing Method and Snippet...

It's Friday! Hmmm, that's all I got! I tried surfing the web looking for inspiration or a spark of an idea and...nothing! I considered putting up a snippet. I considered sharing a recipe. I considered leaving the post blank - with "It's Friday" as my title. I discarded all those considerations.

I could tell you about the minor (major) melt-down I had yesterday over this freakin' story! I could not find a way out of the mess I wrote - couldn't find a way to end it and reveal the bad guy (he's very good and a slip-up on his part just wasn't happening). I ended up having an MSN conversation with my niece (who's reading along as I write) asking her where she thinks it's going (get inside a reader's mind). Ha, first thing she asked was "Is this going to end up your blog tomorrow?" No, I decided to keep the conversation between us.

At the same time, I put in an emergency e-mail to B.E., hoping she could talk me down (the ledge was very high up and I was teetering on the edge).

So, between a reader and a writer, I calmed down and found (I think, I hope) a solution. By the way, if you're looking for a way to write through a block - and you don't have a fabulous niece who's been reading along and knows the story almost as well as you do - then consider B.E.'s advice:

Cards (I used recipe cards) - write down every red herring and how that red herring gets caught and filleted.

With the discussion happening on MSN and my cards, I was able to pinpoint that the bad guy I had originally decided on really was the bad guy AND he's a lot nastier than even I suspected. And I realized that those other red herrings had to be dealt with in some way that ties in with the story. Now I've been a big talker - sharing The Card method with various writer friends (only using them to keep track of scenes) - but I haven't walked the walk. Yesterday, I learned that if I'm talking about a method, that method will probably work. Look at that - a week after NaNo and I'm still learning lessons.

So. It's Friday! And this is a post thanking my niece and B.E. for talking me off the ledge yesterday! And it's a post about a writing method. And it's also a reminder to myself that I am darned excited about this story. Consider me happy :)

And here's a snippet - just because -

Dancing with the Bodyguard - JS Corcoran (copyright)

Dylan reached behind his back. Alex King was high on something. Dylan could not recognize it in himself all those years, but he had certainly learned to see it in others afterward. The shift of his body, the narrowing of his eyes, the slight shake to his hand indicated Alex’s growing agitation.

"I’m about the only friend you still have left, Zee." From agitated to pleading, another indicator. Alex grabbed her wrist. "The only friend you screwed over but still loves you. I need out. You owe me that much at least."

"Let her go, Alex."

"Oh, I forgot your new friend." Alex let her go. Dylan relaxed slightly. "Hey, just wait. You’ll be next. But you have to wait until she’s slept with you."

Zahara struck Alex. The sound of flesh on flesh echoed in the room. Dylan pushed her behind him and drew his gun. But Alex only shook his head as his hand came up to touch the welt already swelling on his cheek. "You’re a bitch. See if that keeps you warm and happy when your dancing career ends."

***

Post NaNoWriMo...

I slept in! Holy moly, I am tired from all that writing! But looking back, I realized there were some lessons in the month:

1. I can write big chunks of story in a very short amount of time, which leads to...

2. I don't need to set aside big chunks of time - a half hour here, a half hour there work well for my writing style.

3. I love to tell a story, which leads to...

4. I am happy when I write - now that's a big lesson.

5. I am much more creative when I write - not just in my writing, but in my life.

6. I have a lot of wonderful people in my life that believe in me - that support helped fuel my push to the finish (thank you).

Those are some fabulous lessons and I'm sure there are more, but did I mention I slept in? And I'm tired? OK, good. Am I happy I undertook NaNoWriMo (versus the other options I suggested in October)? Very much - it has definitely reignited by passion for writing and boosted my confidence. And that's the bottom line.

Any lessons learned from other NaNoWriMos out there?

Words - 3343 To Be Exact...

I managed to break through all my issues and anxieties yesterday and wrote a whopping 3343 words yesterday! It wasn't easy - there were times when my expectations pushed past my defences and my fingers immediately stopped typing. I kid you not, when my Spock Logic gets in the way I literally can not type. Fingers hover over keys, unwilling to hit them for fear of getting it wrong. I freeze - call it stage fright, call it insanity (and those that know me well know I balance precariously on that fence) - just don't call it for dinner! I had a small melt-down when I was reading something about story and character arcs - I should know what they are and how to apply them, but I really feel totally out of my league when the writerly jargon comes up.

Anyway - with all of your advice - and my own reminder that this is supposed to be a fun, over-the-top romp of a story - I got past those two issues and got some serious words on paper! Yay, Me! Today, I'm hoping for more of the same. I will continue to view this story as a wacky boy meets girl, shit happens, boy falls for girl adventure with stalkers, bomb threats, and a bevy of suspects. My job as author of this story is to take these characters on a wild ride - and the wilder the better! Throw caution to the wind!!

Here's a snippet - a little set-up first ~ Zahara (our heroine) has been stood up by her dance partner, Alex, so is teaching a group of teenagers the Quickstep by herself. Another suspect has made an appearance and Dylan (our hero - bodyguard) is feeling the pressure. And cue music...

Dancing with the Bodyguard - JS Corcoran (<©/>2012)

There were more suspects than the poodle had blue ribbons. Dylan's head was about to explode trying to keep track of everyone who could possibly be responsible for leaving the cedar box in Zahara's closet. And Zahara not telling him everything he needed to know to do his job properly. Add to that his boss's insistence ACE Security was indeed only interested in security and that he should leave the police work to the active-duty police officers and all he wanted to do was find the nearest dealer and buy a gram or two.

No! He was stronger than that. Therapy had taught him that going back into a high incident job would trigger his need for the drugs. He had coping skills, he'd use them. There was no way he was going back down that slippery slope of self-destruction.

He tried to focus on the dancers twirling around the floor. He was seated next to the stereo again, Zahara's personal disc jockey, in the private studio she and Alex rented to teach. The group consisted of four couples all around the age of fifteen or sixteen. And, boy, could they move. They were doing something called the Quick Step and Dylan chuckled at the thought of Bannerman getting to that dance in the television competition. The man would need a chiropractor after Zahara got finished manipulating his head, neck and shoulders.

"No!"

He stopped the music, again. She really was a tough task-master, but he could see the respect those kids had for her as they all came to a complete stop and focused 110% on what she was saying.

"I need you to hold her like you love her."

The young men groaned.

"Enough." She pulled one of the girls forward and stepped into hold, she playing the male part. "Strong, firm." Unbelievably, her already straight back lengthened. "Yet, gentle and caring." Her arms looked relaxed.

If he walked over to her and pushed on her arms, they wouldn't move. She was strong. She tipped her head in his direction and he hit the play button. The two women whirled around the floor at breakneck speed.

They stopped. He hit the stop button. At least it wasn't that pop song over and over again, although if they stayed for another hour, he'd come to hate the new bit of music just as much.

The young woman went back to her partner and they stepped into hold again. Zahara moved through the class, adjusting arms, heads, shoulders. She came to the last couple. "She's not a flea-bitten, stanky wench, Gerard."

Everyone giggled. Gerard blushed. Dylan knew that look, knew why Gerard didn't want to hold his partner with gentleness and caring. Zahara wanted him to hold her like he loved her, but Dylan believed the poor lad did. An awkward age to start with, even more awkward when they had to dance in such intimate positions.

"Dylan." Zahara motioned for him to join her on the dance floor.

Oh, hell, no! He hit the play button.

She marched over to where he sat. Sweat immediately beaded on his skin. She reached over him and hit the stop button.

"Could you join me on the floor?"

"No." He didn't say it loudly, but the students must have heard. Some of the girls giggled.

Zahara lowered her voice. "I need you to stand on the dance floor with me so I can show them the hold."

"You did that with the girl."

"She's not a boy."

"At this moment, I wish I wasn't either."

***

Gotta go - left off with Zahara in Dylan's arms and she's just realized that pulling him up in front of the students may not have been her brightest move!!

The 'Move Furniture Itch'...

It must be spring - I have the "Move Furniture Itch!! For those that don't know, I am obsessed with moving furniture at least twice a year. I'm not sure if it's my need for change or if it coincides with spring and fall cleaning and, therefore, moving furniture is just a by-product. All I know is that I start standing in the middle of the living room and envisioning where the couch could possibly move, then I get out a tape measure to see if it's possible, and a couple days pass where everytime I'm in the living room, my eyes wander to various pieces of furniture and imagine them elsewhere. The whole process takes about a week - and then I'm smack-dab in the middle of pushing couches, rolling up carpets, washing walls and floors, dusting nick-nacks and creating a whole new look to my living space.

The living room isn't the only area to get this treatment. Now that we are in a house with laminate floors in the bedroom, I'm able to move our bedroom furniture around, too (moving big dressers and a bed attached to a heavy and awkward headboard on carpet usually ended in frustration, so I stopped doing it). And my office - I manage to move that at least 4 times a year (less furniture).

The furniture re-arranging always gets started before The Husband can protest. He is left to help me move the big stuff into its final, temporary resting place. This time, however, I said casually that I was experiencing the "Move Furniture Itch" at the early stages of the disease, well before I retrieved the tape measure. Lesson learned - I was informed that moving the TV would not be happening this year. Then, he proceeded to show me (because I'm a very visual person and just telling me would result in my a) not believing him or b) ignoring him) that one of the legs of the TV stand (something we bought as a temporary item years ago) has a small crack in the plastic.

So, the TV can't be moved! Which only makes my job more challenging! Instead of rearranging all the furniture, I will have to come up with a new configurement based on the TV staying where it is! Because, you know, unless that itch is scratched, it'll just get worse - fester - basically drive me insane! Of course I could always move the bedroom and the office and see if that satisfies me for now...HA!

Anyone out there get the "Move Furniture Itch"? Is spring cleaning on your agenda for the month of April? Raise your hand if you're glad its April!!!

Lessons in Writing from The Golf Channel...

It's Golf Season and that means more times than not our TV is set to The Golf Channel - The Husband is an avid golfer and loves to follow the game. It also means that I watch The Golf Channel! I will say it has been educational.

It seems the demographic for The Golf Channel is made up of men because....

The commercials are limited to golf products and pharmaceuticals used to enhance drive (a different drive than the golf product would enhance). Who knew so many golfers had that problem (and wasn't Tiger's problem the exact opposite - unless, of course, he is taking some of those pharmaceuticals)?

After a while, the commercials get boring! I mean, how many ways can you advertise that any time is a good time for a little putting practice (see, I knew this would deteriorate into golfing innuendo)? But recently a new commercial has come up (don't go there, people) - and it teaches a valuable lesson for us writers:

Character Traits

I'd show the commercial, but I'm worried all the 'golfers' would know and I already have too much spam e-mail. Basically, the premise is the guy gets turned on ('cause now he can) when he sees his wife/girlfriend doing stuff she unconsciously does all the time (ie: twirling her hair). The narrator, which is a little freaky because there's always a narrator and doesn't that smack of voyeurism?), says, "The reason you fell in love with her in the first place."

As we write our characters, create 3D heroes and heroines from our imagination, we need to remember to give them a quirk or two. Make them as realistic as possible - because we all have our quirks. The commercial reminds me to use those quirks as vehicles in the relationship between the hero and heroine - perhaps the hair twirling gets on the heroine's nerves at first (really, what guy twirls his hair), but then the unconscious habit becomes endearing - and later, when she's needing a reason to play a round, that quirk will remind her of why she fell in love with him in the first place.

Or maybe she drums her fingers all the time. That could drive our hero batty - but later, when he's been torn away from her (kidnapped by renegade golfers determined to add another player to make up a foursome), the sound of drumming fingers by someone else brings her to mind and he realizes he loves her, can't live without her, uses the excuse of buying the next round, steals the beer cart and speeds his way back into his heroine's life.

The point is - characters need those little flaws that set them apart from all the other characters lining the shelves at Characters-R-Us! And those flaws, just like in the TV commercial, should play into your story. My only note to self - make sure the character flaw is not too generic (hair twirling by the heroine) or stereotypical (knuckle cracking by the alpha male).

For a list of great character traits, check out this link: 100 Character Quirks You Can Steal From Me - and the author, Anthony Owens, reminds me that to look closely at your other characters, too (especially the bad guy - he needs a good quirk to make him stand out amongst all the other bad guys - perhaps he's a golfer and practices his swing in any situation - or carries his balls in his pocket (sorry!).

Do you watch The Golf Channel? Any avid golfers in the crowd today? Would you like to weigh in on character quirks or golfing puns?

Vegas, Baby!

My friend Brenda, and her friend Leah, are running this weekend in the Rock n' Roll Las Vegas Half Marathon. Being a supportive kind of person, I, too, am running the half marathon. Just not in Vegas!

I decided to do this - run a race thousands of miles away and all by myself - not only to support Brenda, but to give me something to train for. I've discovered that if there's nothing coming up race wise, I skip my workouts. Yes, you read that correctly. I am lazy. But if I have the incentive of an upcoming event, I will get out and run. Call it a carrot.

With this being a kind of virtual run, I was worried that I would slack off. Obviously I didn't sign up for the race, I won't be running with 40,000 people and the only one who would know for sure that I actually got out there and ran 21K (13 miles) would be me. But I didn't - well, except for that one week where I kind of slacked off.

And that one week? Had I not made the committment to run 'with' Brenda, that one week would have morphed into two, then three, then four. I've already learned the hard way that any time away from consistant running will quickly derail my fitness. After last year's half, I stopped running and when I started up again in January it was like starting from scratch. All that conditioning had disappeared. I took time off after the race in May (not as much, but still time away from running) and the same thing happened.

I need deadlines. So with that in mind, I have already planned my 2012 running schedule to help me stay the running course. And because I'm loving this running thing so much, I have tentatively mapped out my 2013 year (and it's going to be BIG - I turn 50 and I have a goal that is both very scary and very exciting - more on that later). With all this planning, all these carrots, I'm sure to keep myself on the running path.

What kind of carrots do you dangle in your life to keep you on your chosen path? Do you work better with deadlines (and carrots)? Have you ever noticed that time away from something sets you back in skill level or conditioning (I think of my writing and the same is true - obviously the reason why so many advocate writing every day)?

Happy Friday, People of Blogland. And good luck, Brenda and Leah :)

Monday, Monday...

Oops - I'm afraid I didn't have a 'workend'! After four kickass days of NaNo, I stopped! Didn't write one word on the weekend. Not. One.

So my little potato head writer right below this post - all starchy in his cocky wave - has not moved. If there was a way to make him hang is sorry little head, I would put that up. Really, I should poke his eyes out for not working.

Oh, well! Had a great weekend otherwise - and I am not going to beat myself up over the fact I didn't get my words written. If there's one thing I've learned this year from my running, take everyday as a new beginning. Throwing in the towel at the first missed run/write date (or the couple of days of laziness), does not move one forward. In some ways, it moves you backwards at double the rate. And makes starting up that much harder.

I did fill my creative well with a trip to the city to see the play Lost - A Memoir. A one-woman show based on the book by Cathy Ostlere. Powerful is too weak a word to describe the content and the actor!

Wow, I just sat here for 10 minutes lost in thought about the play! I must admit, I am a little fuzzy headed this morning due to the time change (it always puts me out of sync). And to stretch this post about nothing any longer - well, that would be painful for all of us. Let's hope the cobwebs clear before I sit down to my NaNo project. Maybe a second cup of coffee would work.

How was your weekend, People of Blogland? Anyone have a 'workend'?

A Mental Game...

For weeks, months, no, it's been over a year and a half, I have held the notion that I can not run without taking walk breaks. And I was fine with that - afterall, I've finished two half marathons using the run/walk method. But somewhere in the back of my mind or deep down in my running soul, I've wanted to be able to run continuously. The most I've every done is 30 minutes and when I get to that magic number (ooh, Halloween reference), I come to a complete stop.

I reach my mental hurdle!

Like the rider taking his horse through the jumps and getting to the the water jump - a little bigger and more unusual than the other straight forward fences - the brakes go on and the rider falls off! Splash!

This past weekend I met up with a new group that's formed, Riverport Walk & Run, and knew that the two women who would be running would be doing 8 miles at a slow pace, around a 12 minute mile. All doable, with the exception that they would be running continuously! I decided to go for it - try my best and have a back up plan of resorting to run/walk intervals if I found the going too tough. Or if I got to the mental hurdle, my horse stopped and I fell in the water - splash!

Let me just say, I jumped that hurdle with ease. I did the entire 8.63 miles at a steady 12:13 pace and even gave a little gas at the end. And a shout. A big whoop. Arms raised in the air in victory. I had a break through! And the thought that ran through my mind: I am a runner!

It definitely helped to have someone to run with - keep me at a steady pace and my mind otherwise occupied as I jumped those mental hurdles (thanks to Tammy, Liane and Nancy - who ran her longest distance ever on Saturday).

And the lesson learned: my biggest obstacle is ME! So, as I move into the craziness of NaNo, I need to remember to get out of my own way. Trust that I can do it and those mental hurdles are just that - mental. And I won't forget that even though I am writing on my own, I am not alone!

Do you put up mental hurdles, People of Blogland? What kind of strategies do you use to get over them without landing on your ass in the water? Any last minute advice on NaNo (thanks to Lu, who already sent over a fabulous link to Amy Fahrer's blog on Lessons From Pasts NaNoWriMos)?

**You know it's 8am and the whole horse and rider analogy is looking a little weak - am I the rider and my body is the horse? Am I the horse and the rider is my brain? Why is there water - what relation is there to the story? But, see, getting prepared for NaNo - wrote it, didn't edit it - going to jump it!

Chapter Breaks...

When I write, I don't usually think about chapter breaks. OK - probably not the smartest thing in the world considering how hard it is to go in after and decide where to break up the prose. Most likely it's because I'm a pantser - I just write. Whatever comes out of the pen or however my fingers type, that's what I write. Writing Mickey's story has really shown me that I'm a storyteller. But it's also shown me the importance of hooking a reader at the end of the instalment.

Funny, in Lady Bells I was naive and innocent. I was writing for the sake of writing. Then, when it came time to revise - after I had made the decision to move on to the next stage - I instinctively created chapter breaks where there was a hook. I love reading books that give me that thrill at the end of chapter - lure me into 'just one more chapter' as my eyes are burning and The Husband has grunted for the umpteenth time to turn out the light, it's late. To me, that's the sign of an author who can write quite literally a page turner!

My beta readers (my wonderful beta readers) all commented on my ability to entice them to keep reading. My ability to hook the reader. Then came all the technical stuff - the reading about craft and how to create scene/sequel/scene. The three act 'rule' for writing chapters where there should be mini-beginnings, middles and ends in your chapters. I'll be quite frank (and you can be Frank tomorrow night) - I didn't get it! I still don't think I get it. But I do get the fact that I need to tempt my readers into turning that page.

Lu made me give thought to this issue when she commented on Friday's post, Mickey's instalment. I had confused her - and when I first read that I panicked. OMG, don't confuse your reader - they'll put down the book and they'll never, ever think of picking up any book you've written ever again! But, then I started to think. If I had confused her, and that had been a chapter break, would she have kept reading in order to figure things out? Yes, I admit, even I was worried that I hadn't given enough in the segment to tie all the pieces together. But this is the wrapping up of Carol's part of the story, the part where the real test for Mickey begins. I had to write it that way - besides, that's what came from typing on the keyboard.

Then, as I was doing a critique for a writing friend - I came to a scene ending and thought "That should be a chapter break!" The build-up was over - it was onto the big game, the part where it was either going to work itself out or the crap was going to hit the fan. It could go either way, but all the preliminary stuff leading up to that moment was done. To me (no expert - re-read the above paragraphs), it was the perfect spot to end the chapter. Would I have turned that page? Would I have settled further into the pillows in order to read just one more chapter? Would I have said "Yeah, yeah, I know." to The Husband and realize that I would pay tomorrow with burning eyes and exhaustion as I tackle the Day Job? Hell, yes!! Because there was a hook - a lure - and a burning question "What's going to happen?"

I've started reading Sophie Kinsella's newest, Twenties Girl, and I'm watching for her chapter breaks. Do you, People of Blogland, consciously look at chapter breaks when you're reading? How about when you're writing - is it in your mind as you either tell your story in chapters the first time or revise to create chapters? Readers - do you endure another chapter knowing that you'll be tired because the author's left you wanting more? Do you even think about chapter breaks? And last question (boy, I'm chatty, and nosey, about this topic) - have you ever read a book with no chapters? Would you want to? OK, can't resist, one more - are you a reader that must end your reading session at the end of a chapter or can you just finish anywhere when the time to stop reading comes?

*I think I may need to chat about this topic some more!

Woo Hoo!!

I'm writing!

I won't say more in case I jinx myself - or chase Muse away again. But I am writing!

See this paragraph here - yep, there used to be a brilliant discussion on comparing my running with my writing. I talked about logging the miles in order to run a race and the preparation I've undertaken to get me to this point of my writing. I went on to say how much my training is helping me in other areas of my life. And how I have a refined schedule, which is helping with time management. Yep, then as I was trying to format my picture and signature, the paragraph highlighted and with one simple click of a key, it was gone! And I'm too tired to figure out what I said - that'll teach me for writing in Blogger and not on word, then copy/paste! But how's that for tying into the next paragraph - where I also talk about more teaching...

And teaching me self-discipline, which I thought I had in spades, but really only have in fits and starts. (Did you know that the saying 'in spades' originated from the card game Bridge?) I freely admit I am not a finisher - I'm an Idea Girl and when the idea loses its sparkle, my enthusiasm wans. Ooh, maybe that's why I keep moving around - ooh, I don't want to start analyzing that one so let's move on before I end up on a couch spilling my entire life story!

Finally, I am running and writing on Canada's East Coast. And, BTW, I started The Girl with the Dragon Tattoo - so that the reading part :)

Do you have self-discipline, People of Blogland? What motivates you - both internal motivation and external motivation? And if those are too personal and you don't want to end up on an adjoining couch, what are you reading right now?

*Next time, Blogger, could you delete the whole post? It would be much easier to rewrite everything rather than try and paraphrase only one paragraph. Thanks :)

Interesting Discovery...

Leads to lesson learned!

As I'm banging out Mickey Spencer, AC, I'm posting what is essentially a first draft. Since I don't sit down until Thursday night to create the next instalment, I leave myself absolutely no time for serious revisions (other than spelling, grammar - and that I don't guarantee, and possibly a tweak of wording or phrasing). And I think this is where I've had issues in the past.

Let me explain - Lady Bells was written as a first draft (on yellow legal pad paper). I just picked it up and continued on from where I had left off, day after day until I wrote "The End". This, of course, was back in my naive stage where I had no idea about publishing or 'the rules'. Since then, I've attempted a dozen stories and I always, always stop when I think the story is derailing. Or when my brain suggests a different route.

For example - on Thursday, as I sat down at the computer and re-read the last couple of instalments, my brain insisted that I had gone down the wrong road. I shouldn't have had Evan standing at the car waiting for Mickey and Carol to drive past. My brain suggested that Evan should remain out of the story line and Mickey should resolve the case, return to the office and then discover that Jack was working for the parents of the missing woman and that he was missing. Only then would Evan be brought into the storyline!

But, I couldn't do it. The work goes live every Friday morning. I couldn't take back what I had already done. Ask my readers, "Oh, hey, could you go back to Part 17 and forget everything you read from then on? Here, we're going to go this way now." And this is the discovery. I need to stop - no, I need to go! Keep writing - don't stop because I think it would make more sense if I went a different route because if I take that route, then another detour will happen and I'll be derailed - AGAIN!

I have a story on my hard drive (Gillian and Mac's story) that I've started 5 different times. I get to a point and then I say, "Oh, I should have done this." Then, I go back and do that only to come up against a huge brick wall - or another revelation that sends me right back to the start. Writing that first draft should not resemble a game of Snakes and Ladders!

Interesting discovery - lesson learned :)

So, People of Blogland, have you learned this lesson or do you revise as you write? Have you come up against a brick wall because you overthink your first draft? Have you come up against a brick wall in life because you've overthunk your options? Is 'overthunk' a word?

Lesson Learned at Book Club...

Wednesday was the monthly meeting of the book club - and I think I've mentioned here before that this book club doesn't read one book and then come together to discuss. We have monthly themes, each of us is to read a book in the context of that theme, then we share what we've read. This month's theme was Adventure.

I discovered, as we sat around the table (and I tried to focus - hard to do when my seat faced a bank of windows overlooking an inlet and the beautiful pastural land on the other side) that I am not an adventurer. Every book discussed - from mountain climbing to sailing to riding a horse through the desert, alone - had me inwardly shaking my head. No way would I do that. Or that. No to that, too. I am just not an adventurer.

It's like the book we sometimes discuss here, The List - 100 Ways to Shake Up Your Life. So far we've talked about getting radical hair cuts (number 16), and eating something really weird (number 51) and out of those 2, I'm only willing to try one (and it's not the eating one). I look through that book and I think 'No way'! Like Number 37, Dive off a Cliff - um, no! Or Number 24, Learn Trapeze - uh uh! My friend back home is turning 40 and is seriously looking at doing things she's always wanted to do. Parachuting is one of them, to which I say to her "Have fun!"

And I think because I'm not an adventurer, I really don't gravitate towards those kind of books. I certainly have never gone to the Adventure Section in the bookstore. Nor have I stood at the Adventure shelf in the library looking for an interesting title or book to check out (I have done this at the Cooking shelf, the Renovation shelf, and the Health and Wellness shelf). But I believe I'm missing a great opportunity for research. Afterall, the hero in a romance is usually an adventurous type, right? Mac (in Gillian and Mac's story) loves to scuba dive. I would think that an adventure story of the scuba diving nature would help me give more authenticity to Mac's character.

So, I am going to try and include more adventure reading! But that wasn't the lesson I started out wanting to discuss in this post (man, I do like to ramble). The lesson learned at book club is:

Don't ever tell a group of readers that you read the end of the book first!

Wow - that caused quite the reaction.

Anyone out there an adventure reader? How about an adventurer - scuba divers (which is another "No!" for me), mountain climbers, parachuters? And while we're at it, People of Blogland, weigh in on the 'reading the end first' lesson. Go ahead, I can take it - at least it won't be all of you shouting at me at the same time :)

Voice - It's All About the Clothes...

OK, stay with me here. I've been giving much thought to voice since our last conversation (here) and am still mulling over some of the final comments about the struggle some authors have with finding, admitting, being comfortable with their natural voice (and letting go of the fear that it's different - see, thinking and mulling with more to come next week on that scary subtopic of voice). And, as usual, I've been people watching.

So - the two together has brought this analogy. Voice is like the clothes you wear - your signature look. Now I'm not talking about the designer labels or the department store buys, but more about your style. Here's some examples:

My friend Pat wears black. She likes black and I associate Pat with black. I would never walk into a store with Pat and see a bright purple and teal top and exclaim that she must buy it because it would look fab on her. Never! That's not Pat. It's not her style.

My other friend Anna loves to wear funky, flowy garb - very tribal. I think of her as a earthy person - she loves the rusts, browns, oranges, some burgundies. She can wear a caftan and look marvelous (me, not so much) or a pair of leggings worn with a flowy tunic or a long skirt with a simple t-shirt and a casual vest. Would I suggest a purple and teal top if we were shopping together? Nope, not her style.

Another lady I know has amazing style. Tall, thin and always elegantly put together whether she's going to a party or just up to the neighbor's for a morning of tea/coffee and sewing. A simple soft pink long sleeved t-shirt paired with a brown crochet super long vest caught my eye a while back and I wondered why I couldn't pull something like that off. She wouldn't do with the purple and teal, either - but shopping with her would be a much different experience than shopping with Pat or Anna.

What did I say there? I wondered why I couldn't pull something like that off...because that's not my style. I don't think you're born with a 'style', but your personality shapes how you dress. Just as your personality shapes your natural voice. As you grow, mature, live life, your style flourishes. Just as the countless hours of writing, writing, writing helps to enhance and deepen your natural voice.

Am I making sense?

My style? Jeans, running shoes, t-shirts (preferably long Henley-style), sweatshirts. And if I'm getting dressed up? Casual pants that look a lot like jeans, comfortable loafer-style shoes (although I'd prefer running shoes), dressy t-shirts, casual sweaters. I have been known to wear fancier clothes, but my comfort level at that point goes out the door and I'm pretty sure everyone can sense my unease. Ooh, just like when I try to write outside my natural voice. Ooh, another little light bulb flash.

What's your style, People of Blogland? And do you think the analogy works? As always, would love to hear your opinion, comments, issues, insight into voice - the discussion is far from over.

Anyone want a purple and teal top?

Brilliance - Maybe Not...

For today's original post, scroll down...

K - I'm all "Look at me, I know how to use the strike out HTML!" and then the "Don't get cocky Gods" smack my fingers. I'm such a loser.

Over on Murder She Writes, my good friend Silver James is guest blogging. So, over I go to leave a comment - and find the perfect opportunity to put that new strike out knowledge to good use. Yep, didn't close the tag correctly and 2/3rds of the post is has a line through it! I am so brilliant! Really, go - look at the mess I made.

Going to crawl in a hole somewhere now - but I'll leave you with the strike out HTML so you, too, can use it in your comments and blogs (correctly, of course).

<>what you want to have striked out< / strike > (No spaces)

what you want to have striked out

Is 'striked' a word?
EDIT: obviously Blogger is my worst enemy today - please see the comment section for the real HTML code since everytime I put 'strike' in between those carrot brackets, the word disappears when I publish.

One of Those Days...

You know the ones - where you have a specific plan as to how the day's going to go and five minutes in you should just rip up your agenda and sit back and enjoy the ride.

But NOOOOOOOO!! You have to fight it every step of the way - buck the current, force the square peg in the round hole even though you know intellectually that it's not going to fit, believe somewhere in your heart that you can regain the day and salvage the remaining hours! Right up to the bitter end when you sit at your desk, darkness blanketing both windows of your office, eyes barely open, brain begging just to go to bed and start fresh the next morning. Not today, friend, not today.

I had every intention of getting a good 8 hours of the Day Job crossed off the weekly hourly total. I had every intention of getting all the laundry done and the house vaccuumed. The supper was a simple casserole with all ingredients with the exception of a carrot ready to be chucked in together and thown in the oven. Everything in bullet points on the Day Planner right down to the exercise time and a shower!

Um, talk about over scheduling, but I've already shared with you my obsessive compulsive and analytical organizational irrationalities abilities. That's who I am - and I always strive to celebrate my talents.

First up - the exercise was a bust. Oh, I exercised, but I felt as if I'd been out all night. Of course, I slept poorly - so that may have something to do with it. And my back hurt - but really, when you've been doing something for almost 2 weeks and then are sucking air so badly you have to stop! Frustrating.

Next - a bevy of phone calls from family. Victoria Day and it's time to catch up. And I will always stop what I'm doing to chat with family - but all of them? On the same day? Yikes, didn't see that coming! (*waves to family and reminds them that I love them all*)

Supper invitation and a request for a veggie dish. That means the casserole is out and I have to figure out what to do, and what I have to do it with!

Lack of sleep caught up around 3 and I sat on the couch for a quick break only to nod off! Hello? Not on my list. *sigh*

Dog decides not to eat anything all day and then throws up - while I'm napping - waking me up with awful gagging, "I'm going to throw-up" sounds. Nothing brings you out of a sound sleep like the dog getting ready to heave on your living room area rug.

Are you getting the picture. Yep, one of those days. Good thing is that today is a brand new one - and, no, I haven't scheduled my time down to the last millisecond. Some lessons don't need to be repeated more than once (or twice or...)

How was your day, People of Blogland? Am I the only one out there that schedules her day using hourly increments (please, please, please tell me I'm not)? Did you know how to do a strike out in blogger? I didn't until this post - so excited about that!!